Neighbors

A picture of the picture of us as new homeowners.

A few years ago, my wife and I purchased our first house. We were a small family of three, but we planned to expand through biological means and foster parenting. We had looked at the house many years before, and were impressed with the huge trees oak trees that shaded the house and large backyard, but it needed to be renovated. Between work and graduate school, I didn’t have the time to remodel a house section by section. Fortunately, another person purchased the house with plans to flip it. We came to an agreement on the price, and it wasn’t long before we sat at a large table in a conference room, signing paper after paper.  As we moved into the house with the help of several friends, I could picture her and the rest of the family playing and running on summer days in the shade of those oaks. I even imagined building her a tree house with a zip line between two trees, much to my wife’s dismay!

Even though the house had been renovated, I knew that there would still be work to be done. I have definitely found out who my crafty friends are over the years! Our house has been great to live in. We’ve hosted friends, family, and acquaintances for meals, birthday parties, holidays, and playdates through the years. Those trees have seen it all, providing shelter from the rain, shade when it was sunny and hot, and lots of leaves to rake and jump in fall. Being a native West Texan, tree care and maintenance has been a learning experience for me, but I have kept my trees pruned and periodically checked.

My dogs are notorious photo bombers!

Some of you may have noticed the blogging hiatus (well, really, I just transferred to photoblogging  on Instagram and Facebook) while my wife was hospitalized for a little over two months. During that time, people poured out of the woodwork and offered to cook meals, clean, mow, babysit, and shop. I am very grateful for those who helped, gave, or prayed, because my life narrowed to a pinpoint of keeping my family together. Extraneous things didn’t really matter; taking care of my daughter, wife, and work responsibilities were my only priorities. Even though Kara was hospitalized, I continued my morning routine of getting up early(ish) and reading my Bible on our back porch. One morning, I staggered through making coffee, poured a cup, grabbed my bible, and went to the back door.  I’ll never forget the wall of green that greeted me and thinking, “What is that? Do I need a new prescription for my glasses?” A limb had fallen off one of the trees during the night, and there it was, laying across half of my backyard. When others saw the downed limb, they thought it was a tree. It was BIG, but it had fallen perfectly so that there was no damage. A good friend of mine saw it and immediately came over (without my knowledge) and cleaned up the limb before I could even try to tackle it on my own.

First, let me take a selfie!

I called a tree service, and had the trees inspected. The trees were declared healthy, but the tree service guy told me that the original tree would need to be cut way back and half of it removed or I would lose the whole tree. It turned out water was collecting in the fork of the tree and had rotted the juncture to the point that the limb fell. I won’t tell you the estimate to remove the tree and prune other spots, but let’s just say that I could buy a small car for the amount he wanted. Fortunately, one of my buddies told me not to worry about the tree service and that he and I would tackle the limb and tree maintenance. It was a win/win situation. My friend needed firewood, and I needed a tree removed.  Problem solved! So, one Friday, I rented a boom, we collected our chainsaws, and got to work cutting limbs and pruning.

A month passed, our due date approached, relatives came into town, I moved into the hospital with Kara, and we began wait to meet our little girl face to face. I was excited about the birth of my daughter, Kara being able to come home, and that the weather was turning! It meant I would be able to wear the new cardigan Kara gave me as a “push present” in our going home pictures. After a few days in NICU, we were released to come home and we arrived safe and sound with a new baby girl! Unfortunately, the weather only turned cool and muggy, not cool enough to wear a cardigan. With the cool front came the rain. Lots of rain. It did not flood in our area, but just a few miles south of us there was flooding. According to reports we received approximately 17 inches of rain over five or so days.

They forgot monsoon season.

A week later, Kara and the girls went out for a doctor’s appointment and shopping trip. I was home alone for a few hours, cleaning up odds and ends, and tinkering. It had been drizzling all morning, but the rain was supposed to stop after lunch. I planned to work outside most of the afternoon, cleaning gutters and raking a few leaves. I was in the front of our house putting up folded clothes when I heard a loud crack and banging noise. The dogs went NUTS! At first I thought it was a garbage truck emptying the dumpsters at the school we live near (they are LOUD), then I realized it was Saturday. I immediately looked out the front windows, but didn’t see anything. I decided to go outside and look around from the backyard. (I have chain link fencing, so you can see quite a bit.) As I walked down the hall, I realized the sound I heard was one of my trees falling across mine and into two of my neighbor’s yards.

 

You know you this picture came to mind when you read the words Home Alone.

My jaw hit the floor when I walked outside, I checked to make sure there were no dogs (or people) trapped under it, and grabbed the phone to call my Dad and see what I needed to do first. (Did I mention this was my first home?) At my parent’s recommendation, I started called the insurance company and made a claim. When I got off the phone, I drove around to my neighbor’s house to see if they were home. They were, and we went in their backyard to look at the damage. All I could see were dollar signs, hospital bills, and damage, but my neighbor was pretty jovial about the whole thing. As a matter of fact, both of them were. (They’ve been around.) They were cracking jokes about their expensive zero turn mowers being under the tree, my tree knocking limbs off their highly valued trees, and other remarks. Both told me not to worry about it, that no one could have known the tree would fall, and that we would see what insurance would do about it and divvy up costs. I have learned quite a bit about insurance since that afternoon, and am still not quite sure that it’s not one big Ponzi scheme. I say that even after dealing with a great and courteous adjuster who explained to me how insurance liability works.

For those of you in the know, insurance doesn’t cover damage to others’ property unless you’re negligent, which I wasn’t. Also, the damage estimates weren’t more than the deductible, so we pay out of pocket for repairs. That meant I had to call my neighbors and tell them that insurance wouldn’t cover their property repairs. Both were excellent about the matter (as I said, this wasn’t their first rodeo) and told me that they knew I had a new kiddo, an extended hospital stay, and that we could split the cost of fixing the fence three ways. One neighbor told me he wanted to be neighborly. Dealing with the hospital bills and everything else, I cannot tell you the relief I felt at that. Will I still cover as much of the cost as possible?  Yes.

The Great Tree Debacle of 2015

Laugh at my naivety, but I have a hard time understanding how I’m not liable for their damage when it’s my property that caused it. I asked the insurance adjuster about the ethical premise for this, but he wasn’t a philosopher, so he declined to answer. (I realize that I think differently than most of the people I interact with.) Most people say, “I don’t know if it’s right, but that’s how the insurance system works,” as I discuss this event with others. I spoke with an unnamed party the other day who told me they agree with the insurance companies, and that if their tree fell on their neighbor’s house, they would go over and say, “No hard feelings, but my insurance covers my property and yours should cover yours.” I replied, “Not only do I have to look myself in the eye as I brush my teeth every morning, but I have to look across the fence at these guys as long as I live there. I cannot feel that I did them wrong, no matter what anyone else thinks.”

Philosophy and ethics aside, I do know one thing from all of this: I have learned what it means to be neighborly. Both of my neighbors could be angry about this event. They could accuse me of negligence, badger me about the cost, whatever. Instead, they’re staying friendly, even as the tree service can’t work due to the weather, the fencing contractor can’t start until the tree is gone, and we all have to keep our dogs under watch so they don’t cross fences. Everyone is making a little extra effort, and I’ve done nothing to deserve it!

The Parable of the Good Samaritan

Just then an expert in the law stood up to test Him, saying, “Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life? ”

“What is written in the law? ” He asked him. “How do you read it? ”

He answered:

Love theLord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.

“You’ve answered correctly,” He told him. “Do this and you will live.”

But wanting to justify himself, he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor? ”

Jesus took up the question and said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho and fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him, beat him up, and fled, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down that road. When he saw him, he passed by on the other side. In the same way, a Levite, when he arrived at the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a •Samaritan on his journey came up to him, and when he saw the man, he had compassion. He went over to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on olive oil and wine. Then he put him on his own animal, brought him to an inn, and took care of him. The next day he took out two •denarii, gave them to the innkeeper, and said, ‘Take care of him. When I come back I’ll reimburse you for whatever extra you spend.’

“Which of these three do you think proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of the robbers? ”

“The one who showed mercy to him,” he said.

Then Jesus told him, “Go and do the same.”

As I live through the Tree Debacle of 2015, the world seems to be in turmoil. We’re all neighbors today. What if all the Christian churches in the U.S. who have an empty parsonage or home stepped up and took 1 refugee family each? Appropriate security checks could be made, boundaries set, and they could provide for the families for a limited time, help the men/parents find jobs, education for the kiddos, and integrate them into their towns and American culture. I’m no mathematician, but I would think there would be enough places to take in 10,000 refugees (and even more in the coming years). I believe America has over 200,000 Christian churches.

I've never been a refugee, but I can only imagine that I would be a lot more open to assimilating into a new country's culture and customs (much less hearing about a foreign religion) if I were greeted, cared for, and helped to support my family by the average citizens of the country. I'm not saying it would be easy, and I'm not saying it wouldn't come with challenges (cultural gaps, security checks, etc…), but in lieu of a) creating more government dependents and b) isolating groups of refugees in large urban areas where they'll be isolated and disoriented, and ripe for the picking of extremists and scam artists, let’s welcome them and help them become Americans! I felt lost enough in a foreign country where English was prevalent and I was with friends; I couldn't imagine the disorientation and fear of having lost all home connections and being in a new society where I was viewed with constant suspicion. It can be done, and has been done before; see this article in WORLD magazine.

While there is a valid point that we could be letting in enemy combatants among the refugees, ISIS already has followers here and is constantly recruiting from American citizens. They brag daily that they have operatives here! The vast majority of the refugees are running from war, not to it! Let's step up to the plate, get over our fear, recognize the dignity of fellow human beings, provide and care for the oppressed, and let the governments and military appointed by God to dispense justice do their jobs! Think about the impact being neighborly would have on our states, our nation, and the globe!